THE FOUR ORDERS
(with apologies to A. A. Milne)

David was a Bishop, a controversial fellow;
Leonard was a Priest, and his hair was a mess;
George was a Deacon, and his shirts were yellow!
And Lucy was a Deaconess.

Leonard had a Vicarage, and a nice smart new one;
David had a Palace which was hard to heat;
George had a flat, but a rather noisy, small one;
But Lucy kept her maisonette neat.

David started preaching and confused his congregation;
Leonard started signing in the choristers' stall;
George started looking for posts above his station;
But Lucy couldn't look for anything at all.

David preached on Easter, and raised quite a rumpus;
Leonard gave up singing and began to pray;
George studied liturgy with the aid of a compass;
But Lucy wasn't needed all day.

David was a Bishop, and very well-intentioned;
Leonard was a Priest, who thought himself the best;
George was a Deacon who wanted to be mentioned;
But Lucy was just a Deaconess.

Lucy got ordained, and half the church applauded;
David muttered something about the Apostolic Line;
Leonard went to Rome in a manner rather sordid;
But George thought her ministry was fine.

Lucy was accepted by all the parish, barring two;
David changed his mind about the female priest;
Leonard lit his lamps to the lady clothed in bright blue;
And George could finally celebrate the Feast.

David was a Bishop, a free-thinking fellow;
Leonard was now a Father and in a right old mess;
George, affirming priesthood, thought the Church should mellow;
And Lucy could at long last, bless.

 

Pharisaios Publications 1986, 2001

 

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