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Acts
of the Apostles 8: 9-20
9. In
that city (in Samaria) there was a man named Simon who had practiced
magic there, and amazed his audiences with sleight of hand, and one
particularly clever trick involving goats.
10. And all of Samaria was quite impressed saying, Crikey! He's
good, isn't he! His power must be of God. Can we get tickets for
next Friday?
11. And they all watched him diligently, for verily he was very
good. Amazing.
12. And lo, Philip came unto them with his gospel road-show, and
came even unto Simon.
13. And Simon said unto him, Go on, pick a card. Any card.
14. But Philip raised his eyes to heaven saying, I come with the
word of God.
15. Yet Simon persisted, and waved his arms before Philip saying,
You see this hat? Quite empty - check it for yourself. Now watch
this!
16. And behold, a white rabbit was brought forth, and the crowd
smiled saying, Ah!
17. And Philip was put into a large box, and the doors shut upon
him, and countless swords inserted through that box. Yet was he not
hurt in any way.
18. And Philip was also impressed, yet proceeded to tell Simon why
he had come.
19. And all the people, Simon amongst them, were baptized, but not
before he had changed the colour of the water in the pitcher, and
made doves alight on the heads of all present.
20 For he was amazed.
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